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I'll give her credit for having realized this at 17, but masturbating/talking about your masturbation doesn't make you mature or intelligent, it basically makes you a chimp that's capable of speech. If you don't think it's anyone's …

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Have a great day!

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It’s been five long years since my youngest son died of the disease of addiction. It’s taken me this long to go through his belongings without collapsing into a blubbering heap on the floor. I found the following article he had written tucked away with all of his treasured mementos. Tears of happiness and pride, along with great sadness streamed down my face while reading his accounting of his life.

I’d like to share this with others because it is a legacy from my son, which reminds me of, and reinforces, the goodness that was him. A legacy which shows that he did indeed listen to virtually all of our teachings and examples of how to live a good life as demonstrated to him by my husband and myself.

The one lecture that went in one ear and out the other was the admonition to never do drugs, to never take that first hit. But as science is showing, kids who turn to drugs already have a problem. It isn’t the drugs that cause their problems. It is their personal problems that turn them to drugs.

Outwardly, our son had it all. He had his youth, incredibly good looks, a high (150) IQ, multiple musical talents, enough charisma to charm the entire world, an affinity for writing, actually being paid to write newspaper columns for our local paper. He was an avid reader and an outstanding Paramedic and RN. All the girls loved him and life was just great for him…until he turned 17 and was given his first hit of cocaine by a fellow bandmate.

It was all downhill from there. There was no turning back. Cocaine was the oil that fueled his body now, it was the reason to live. He told me in one of our many conversations about drugs, that doing cocaine made him feel like what he perceived “normal” people felt like. He never felt quite normal. He, (as so many addicted people) suffered from a lack of self-esteem. With all that he had going for him and for all of our loving, nurturing ways, he still lacked this important element in his life. We’ll never know why but according to Dr. Neil Beck, author of the book Beating Heroin, people who turn to drugs already have a problem; it isn’t the drugs that cause the problem. Their genetic makeup is responsible for their addiction.

It stands to reason then, that no one should take a chance with drugs, because no one knows if they are predisposed to addiction. There is only one way to find out and that is akin to closing the barn door after the horse has gotten out. Too late!

Here then, is my son’s accounting of his life, how he saw the world and how he viewed his parents and society. The sadness I feel sometimes about his addiction is over-ridden by the joy I feel in having had him as my son for 31 years 4 months and 3 days.

In Scott’s words: “Think about it.” Those were the words I heard often as a small child growing up in North Carolina. This was the answer my father would give me as I asked him the myriad questions about life that all youngsters do. I knew that my questions would usually lead to a dialogue that would invariably lead to even more questions, and it was during these formative years that I began to develop critical thinking skills, enjoying the thrill of investigating scientific truth through philosophical inquiry.

Throughout my childhood I was taught to not take anything at face value, to be a skeptic. At the dinner table, debate was encouraged. Always seeking to get to the bottom of a matter and to view an idea from all angles, to detect bias in claims and to discuss how culture, politics, religion and money for example may skew the interpretation of reality. Logic and reason were weaved through my childhood and blanketed me with trust in the scientific method. Along with this came a teaching of the preciousness of life. While others dreamed of lives past and a life in the hereafter, my family put their bets on this being the only life known of, and to enjoy it fully.

Mine was a wonderful and magical childhood, barefoot and free-spirited in the woods, as much like Huck Finn as my father was when he was a boy. And my mother, the artist, a smart and loving hippie who taught me, along with my father, the principles of humanity, civility and freedom.

Stray cats were taken in and fed, along with any other homeless domesticated life form that happened upon us. I learned to love and to be kind to animals. I learned about the sanctity of life, and I was taught to never harm another living creature, unless for survival. There was no humane society where we lived so my parents founded one through persistence and patience. I was taught that the right thing to do was the humane thing to do. I learned about the cruelty of man in his treatment of animals, zoos, circuses, hunting, fishing and any other enterprise where animals were either mistreated or exploited for the profit or amusement of man. Logic and humanity ruled.

I learned a lot about our system of justice growing up, and was taught that justice truly is not blind, and that often, there is none. I learned about racism, religion, dogma, money and poverty and how they were all related to each other in our cultural context.

I was encouraged to seriously think about the origins of the universe and not to ever accept a ready made explanation just because some things were as yet unanswered. After all, broad-minded men have been discovering answers about the world in which we lilve since the beginning of recorded history.

I learned that the concept of God or a high power evolved through a cultural natural selection process to explain the inexplicable and to cohese and organize society, that it was man who created God, and not the other way around. And finally, that it was all too often rife with hypocrisy and used to oppress and control the masses, that spiritualism was just a word to describe a conscious thought process and that cognition itself arose from the complex physiological process of electrochemical transfer along millions of synapses, governed by the laws of physics and giving rise to awareness.

I was raised to look up to people or ideas that were civilized and who used their minds. Thinkers, not thugs. Philosophers, pioneers. To value an Archimedes or an Aristotle over an athlete any day. The idea that my body belonged to me was taught throughout my life, that it is not our government’s job to determine how I treat it, indeed that the government in these matters should only be concerned with how I would treat another, i.e., keep your laws off my body, and as Kurt Vonnegut said, ‘Stay out of my body bag.’

I was taught to answer to a higher law, the laws of reason, that just because something is against the law does not make it wrong. I was not taught to simply “obey the law.”

My parents are both atheists and anarchists who raised me to see how truly uncivilized we are as a society, that one day laws will not be needed, that we will not have to live in fear of Big Brother and our own neighbors, that men will govern themselves according to laws of reason, but that we are not there yet, and to try and live my life as civily and humanely as possible.

Boxing, football, and any other “sport” that encouraged violence were examined by my family and discussed in light of civility. Ultimately, any form of violence was dissuaded. And finally, good old-fashioned manners were instilled in me. To say Please and Thank You and May I Please Be Excused. And to be polite and well-behaved.

I was also strongly encouraged to read, and my literary influences were Kurt Vonnegut, John Steinbeck, Henry David Thoreau, Sallinger, Mark Twain and the Bronte’ sisters. The common thread most of these authors had, with the exception of the Brontes’, was that they satired man’s ridiculous beliefs on behaviors, and stripped their protagonists of wealth and influence, only to reveal the nuts and bolts of the human experience, survival and character.

So in all, logic, reason, kindness, freedom, civility, humanity and manners were the foundations of my upbringing and I am thankful to my two loving parents, who did their best and always went out of their way to do the right thing.

Now how did these values impact my adult life? Well I guess the main negative impact it had was that I grew up in the minority. This always made me feel different and you know kids just want to be like everyone else. This caused me to have feelings of insecurity as I grew up being made fun of because I spoke and thought so differently from my peers.

Another negative impact was that, though I was taught to play the game, the reality of the game as so illustrated to me was that I overlooked playing it and as a result I bucked the system. And you know what happens when you fight the power; the power wins. Every time.

I think that these two things contributed to my using, to mask my feelings of inadequacy. As far as the positive results go, well I am proud that I am a rational human being and have the ability to see things for how they are. I also am a friend to animals everywhere and I am proud that my money does not support cruel enterprises. All in all – I am a good person.

Another positive impact is that I had a happy childhood and despite how I ruined my life as an adult, I will always have that. And I’ve never struggled with faith, I’ve never found the word logical unless applied to one’s self. And I have great inner peace about my values, for I believe them to be gentle and kind.

Also, I have the critical thinking skills necessary to get into and successfully pass law school, and when I become an attorney, I will have the opportunity to advance and promote the ideas of skepticism, logic, humanity, civility, and justice that I think are quintessential to the intellectual evolution of mankind.

In summation, I learned to be a maverick. But for me today, I know that I have to be a sober maverick, to influence society in a positive way, and to find serenity within myself.”

So spake Scott. His words both comfort and sadden me. Were we, his parents, truly responsible for his drug addiction? In one way we were, but not deliberately so; we passed on to him some bad genes. Knowing that he felt ostracized by his peers because he dared to think differently, as we taught him, did that turn him to drugs? I don’t think so, for two reasons: One is because it would be too hurtful for me to think that we may have harmed our son by our teachings. The other reason I don’t believe that we were responsible is because we raised his older brother exactly the same, with the same values and beliefs and he did not turn to drugs. I truly believe there was something inherent in Scott’s genetic makeup, as espoused by Dr. Beck, that led him down this path.

Scott wrote his tribute to us and now I lovingly turn it over to the world as a tribute to my son. It was my honor and privilege to have him as a son, along with his brother. In the words of William Wordsworth – I loved the boy with the utmost love of which my soul is capable of and he is taken from me – yet in the agony of my spirit in surrendering such a treasure, I feel a thousand times richer than if I had never possessed it.

1f51

Sheryl Letzgus McGinnis is the author of the book “I Am Your Disease (The Many Faces of Addiction)” published by Outskirts Press. You can read about, and purchase the book at http://www.iamyourdisease.com

I am a retired medical transcriptionist and radio DJ who also did voiceovers for TV. Married, with one living son, having lost my youngest son Scott, who was a paramedic and an RN to the disease of addiction. Happily married for 41 years to Jack, 8th grade science teacher. My oldest son Dale is a graduate student in Environmental Sciences and is a musician with his own band, New Gravity.

We live in Palm Bay, Florida. I am originally from Brisbane, Queensland, Australia and am a citizen of both Australia and the US. We are owned by one dog and four cats!

Article Source:

http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Sheryl_Letzgus_McGinnis

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You won't necessarily lose your virginity by masturbating.

You can masturbate very pleasurably and effectively by stimulating your clitoris and your labia. You don't have to put your fingers or anything else into your vagina to give yourself pleasure.

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